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A Thousand Times

by Alan Apuli

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1.
Replay 04:21
It's only every now and then The thought of you comes into mind Just to tinker with the moment Making up for our lost time Our favorite song on the radio plays The Bleachers singing how they're not okay How they want to get better We want to get better Just two young kids that feel we're not enough We put on this record screaming give me love Wish I could sing it better I couldn't have sang it better But when I'd look You were jamming out the corner of my eye I'd cut the volume and you'd say you're too shy I wasn't better so I'd say I don't mind On the road smoke in our lungs Passing the same exit more than once Nothing mattered when this volume's up Now we're we in love or is this just fun? And ooh, ooh, ooo, ooo When I sing our song It's like you're not gone And you, ooo, ooo, ooo You sounded right as rain As I loved you on replay It's like it was only yesterday I asked you bout your favorite song I thought I knew the lines by heart But all the words just came out wrong Then you asked me how I write these tunes I said I simply thought of you You'd brush me off and call it cute Said you should see my point of view While you looked off right as I glanced I hoped you took that similar chance Cause when I'd look You were jamming out the corner of my eye I'd cut the volume and you'd say you're too shy I wasn't better so I'd say I don't mind On the road smoke in our lungs Passing the same exit more than once Nothing mattered when this volume's up Now we're we in love or is this just fun? And ooh, ooh, ohh, ohh When I sing our song It's like you're not gone And you, ooo, ooo, ooo You sounded right as rain As I loved you on replay And ooh, ooh, ooo, ooo When I sing our song It's like you're not gone And you, ooo, ooo, ooo It's only every now and then The thought of you comes into mind
2.
Day by day we're walking steady On the side of this parking lot The weight of the world feels heavy When a heart holds a lot Your footsteps full of conviction But a composure full of holes You didn't think I'd notice you But I see the miles worn on your soles But oh this fragile heart, won't even start I'm in repair, you're still apart From all your toil, your heart's turned stone You're not a alone I want to feel alive I want to dive in deep I want to fall for you Without falling on my knees I want to blur these lines I want to take my time I want to ease your mind I want to make you mine On the chance we speak I'm ready I've reminisced a hundred times Thinking those three words so heavy But I guess I'll start with "Hi" I'm not ashamed just a bit unsteady My heart's always been on my sleeve I wish that I had met you then When I could say I did believe But oh this fragile heart, won't even start I'm in repair, you're still apart From all your toil, your heart's turned stone You're not a alone I want to feel alive I want to dive in deep I want to fall for you Without falling on my knees I want to blur these lines I want to take my time I want to ease your mind I want to make you mine But oh this fragile heart, won't even start I'm in repair, you're still apart From all your toil, your heart's turned stone You're not a alone (No, you're not alone) I want to feel alive I want to dive in deep I want to fall for you Without falling on my knees I want to blur these lines I want to take my time I want to ease your mind I want to make you mine I want to make you mine I want to make you mine
3.
Worth it 03:18
We've been here before counting stars Spending most our time in our arms But I'm afraid my dear, of just how long? And what will be left when I'm gone As the night time fades, so do these stars One by one, wavering our paper hearts But we both knew this from the start That we'd be counting down all along So if you were to break my heart I suggest that you take it too You might as well cause last I checked that It was meant for you Now I can't say where it all goes from here But if this were easy, it would be crystal clear But now we're heading for this crash course Break down, go around, my dear it's for certain We should have gone for the brakes now, slow down Cause I, feel that you're worth it now I feel that you're worth it now Watching movies couch potatoes And the moonlight over head, your halo And the way I looked at you, they all know And I was foolish to let you go So if you were to break my heart I suggest that you take it too You might as well cause last I checked that It was meant for you Now I can't say where it all goes from here But if this were easy, it would be crystal clear But now we're heading for this crash course Break down, go around, my dear it's for certain We should have gone for the brakes now, slow down Cause I, cause I Cause I can't say where it all goes from here But if this were easy, it would be crystal clear But now we're heading for this crash course Break down, go around, my dear it's for certain We should have gone for the brakes now, slow down Cause I, feel that you're worth it now I feel that you're worth it now I feel that you're worth it now I feel that you're worth it now
4.
Rose Lenses 04:05
I thought that I was stronger than this We laughed, we'd cried, you were the one That I'd hate to miss You were the girl in my limelight I was the boy who thought he'd find Someone I waited for all my life Now I'm stuck debating, was this right? But I've got my mind made up Cards on the table You say that distance's a fable You're holding onto this fiction While I wore rose lenses Your flags became vacant And what felt like a lifetime I can't say that I hated But we grew apart Now it's like you're someone I don't know With your idea so strong How do I let go? This circumstance has never been the best to me It became habit running to you, tied to a tree And every moment I woke I couldn't tell between your smoke and mirrors It was all just for show We played our parts and now it's left me bitter But I've got my mind made up Cards on the table You say that distance's a fable You're holding onto this fiction While I wore rose lenses Your flags became vacant And what felt like a lifetime I can't say that I hated But we grew apart Now it's like you're someone I don't know With your idea so strong I found the taste of you Bittersweet than I recall And if I went through this again I don't know who would break my fall And I'm falling And I'm falling But I've got my mind made up Cards on the table You say that distance's a fable You're holding onto this fiction While I wore rose lenses Your flags became vacant And what felt like a lifetime I can't say that I hated But we grew apart Now it's like you're someone I don't know With your idea so strong How do I let go?
5.
A few more steps till your front porch My finger steady on my phone And I'm already six numbers in I hear it ring for quite sometime I hit the doorbell and it chimes But it's clear nobody's home And while I'm out here in the pouring rain You're probably out with what's his name And I fell in line, with these habits of mine And fell in love for the thousandth time Just once more I think out loud Maybe this will work somehow But cliches don't work at all They taught me to lay it on the line But that's just Hollywood's design No fairy tale could dictate me And while I'm out there in the pouring rain You're probably out with what's his name And I fell in line, with these habits of mine And fell in love for the thousandth time I should take the fact that you're not there When I need you most you don't seem to care You say I'm your best but I don't know anymore (I don't know anymore) Darling, I'm a mess and you loved that too If that's your love then it just won't do I'll say that I'm fine cause I'm a liar too (Cause I'm a liar) While I fall in line With these habits of mine And fall in love for the thousandth time While I fall in line, with these habits of mine (While you're out there in the pouring rain) And fall in love for the thousandth time (I'm probably out with what's his name) While I fall in line, with these habits of mine (While you're out there in the pouring rain) And fall in love for the thousandth time (I'm probably out with what's his name) While I fall in line, with these habits of mine And fall in love for the thousandth In love for the thousandth In love for the thousandth time

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released April 29, 2022

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Alan Apuli Chicago, Illinois

Chicago-based Musician

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